Your Mileage May Vary

Sorry for the hiatus. It’s not really over. Picture me as the groundhog that sticks her head out to see if winter’s over yet (or to drop a novella, same diff, right?). Once it’s confirmed that winter is not over (or that the novella is on Smashwords), it’s back into the hidey hole. It’s been a really tough couple of years health-wise, mental-health wise, and family-wise, and I’m not done dealing. Best of luck to anyone out there who also feels like they’ve been treading water this whole time.

But also this:

A few years ago I tried Patreon. While I’m still very grateful to the folks who followed me over there and gave it a chance, it didn’t suit my writing style at all. So I bailed. But before I did, I completed a novella that I’m releasing on Smashwords on April 18 for 1.99.

Your Mileage May Vary is about what happens when the guy you’re falling for has a secret fetish that you 100% do not share. It’s less about the kink in question than about figuring out how to handle it there’s a big incompatibility in a burgeoning relationship.

Blurbity:

Daniel "Nuke" Nuka is a hot mess. He hates his day job, he routinely overdrafts his checking account, and he can't remember the last time he ate a vegetable. The one reliable bright spot? His best buddy Lee. Sure, Lee's uptight and finicky and he has that weird thing about using coasters, but he also has Nuke's back.

Lee Hapsburg III is not a hot mess—or at least that's what he tells himself. He has a promising future at his law firm, a flourishing stock portfolio, and...a secret fetish that's always made sex a land mine of stress and shame. Lee's been hiding his kink for so long that when Nuke stumbles across the evidence, his first reaction is panic.

Nuke is admittedly repelled by Lee's fetish, but it's become habit by now to take care of his buddy. So he makes an offer that will turn their friendship—and their lives—into one big hot mess.

It is a friends-to-lovers romance about relationship negotiation and what happens when you don’t use your words. Fair warning—Lee and Nuke handle everything wrong. I think it’s amusing when idiots fail at adulting, but I can see where it would be frustrating. If you’ve ever found yourself screaming “JUST SAY YOU LOVE THEM” to someone in a book before, this one may not be for you.

Fair warning #2: Nuke is the point of view character and he doesn’t think Lee’s fetish is hot at all. So if you’re looking for golden showers erotica, this probably isn’t it.

Fair warning #3: This is my first book on Smashwords and there is a learning curve to the process that I almost certainly have not mastered. It looks right on my end, but I don’t know what other apps and devices will do with it. Apologies if all the words starting with T vanished or something. I don’t know what the hell I’m doing half the time, let alone when I’m trying to use Microsoft Word’s more advanced features. And I was out of spoons by the end anyway, so the formatting may have a general air of “fuck it.” Feel free to return if it isn’t as readable as you’d like.

Link: Your Mileage May Vary

Okay, I think that’s it. Hope you’re all staying safe. Back to the hidey hole.